Counting Down

Our time with Abbie is getting shorter by the second. I can't believe the anger that I am feeling right now. This past Sat. we found out that the foster family backed out. I didn't want to get my hopes up, but I thought maybe God was going to answer our prayers. Then today we got a call about another family. She wants her on Saturday.

I feel like a yo-yo. I know that God is a God of love, but I do not feel very loved right now. I want to throw something or hit someone. I know anger is a part of grief, but I didn't realize how bad it would be.

I can't help but think: Only 4 more baths, only 4 more nights in her bed,and so forth. Every minute means so much. I feel like my heart is being ripped from my chest. As much as I hate to lose her, I will be glad when it is over. Maybe then the healing process can begin.