Mother's Day

I had such dreams for today. Abbie and I would wear matching dresses to church. I would, for the first time ever, stand up in church to receive my recognition as a mother. We would go out to eat and people would look at our family and ooh and aah over my beautiful baby girl. Instead, I slept in and vegged in front of the TV during church time. I just couldn't face the looks of pity when others saw my tears. Or mothers' smiling faces, glowing from motherhood. I plan on staying home the entire day. Yes, I am hiding. But today, hiding is all that I can handle. Tomorrow, I will face the world. Now I am going to find a good book to curl up with and act as if there is no pain in my heart.